How to Host a Salon Dinner: A Step-by-Step Guide to Creating Meaningful Conversations

One of my favorite ways to foster deep, meaningful connections is by hosting salon dinners—intimate gatherings designed to spark engaging group conversations over a shared meal. In a world where loneliness is on the rise, these carefully structured dinners provide a space for authentic dialogue, connection, and community-building—all of which are essential for mental health and well-being.

What Is a Salon Dinner? The Concept & Why It Works

A salon dinner is an intimate gathering where everyone at the table participates in one guided conversation throughout the meal. Unlike traditional dinners with multiple small conversations happening simultaneously, a salon dinner encourages deep listening, thoughtful responses, and shared storytelling. This format helps build stronger relationships and creates a space for vulnerability and connection.

How to Host a Successful Salon Dinner: Step-by-Step Guide

1️⃣ Facilitate the Dinner:

• As the host, you set the tone for the evening. Your role is to:
  • Explain the salon dinner format.
  • Provide thought-provoking discussion questions.
  • Manage time and guide the conversation.

2️⃣ Establish the Ground Rules:

• To ensure an engaging and respectful conversation, encourage guests to:
  • Stay present (phones away!).
  • Listen actively without formulating responses while others speak.
  • Avoid side conversations or interrupting the speaker.

3️⃣ Choose the Right Discussion Format:

• Options include:
  • One Question for the Group: Everyone answers the same prompt.
  • Rotating Questions: Different questions for different guests.
  • Themed Questions: Topics centered around personal growth, storytelling, or societal issues.

📌 Best Salon Dinner Questions to Spark Meaningful Conversations

Choosing the right salon dinner questions is crucial for creating an environment where guests feel comfortable sharing deeply and authentically. Here’s why each of these questions works and how they can lead to memorable, thought-provoking discussions:

1️⃣ Tell us about a key turning point in your life after which you feel your life completely changed.

🔹 Why this works:
This question invites guests to reflect on pivotal moments that shaped their path—whether personal, professional, or relational. It encourages vulnerability and storytelling, allowing participants to share experiences that reveal their values, challenges, and growth.

🔹 Possible conversation outcomes:

• Someone might share about a career shift, a major move, or an unexpected life event that reshaped their worldview.
• It can lead to discussions about resilience, reinvention, and the power of embracing change.
• It helps attendees find common ground in overcoming obstacles or pursuing new opportunities.

2️⃣ What is one trait from either one of your parents that you hope to emulate?

🔹 Why this works:
This question invites people to explore their personal influences, family values, and intergenerational wisdom. It allows guests to speak about admired qualities in a parent (or a mentor figure) while also revealing their aspirations and ideals.

🔹 Possible conversation outcomes:

• People might discuss hard work, kindness, resilience, humor, or empathy—all valuable leadership traits.
• It often sparks nostalgic and heartfelt stories, deepening the emotional connection among guests.
• It naturally leads to conversations about mentorship, legacy, and how values are passed down.

3️⃣ What is something you’ve felt truly passionate about in your life and why?

🔹 Why this works:
Passion fuels purpose. This question allows guests to share what lights them up, providing insight into what drives them, what excites them, and what makes them feel most alive. It also invites participants to learn from one another’s enthusiasm and curiosity.

🔹 Possible conversation outcomes:

• This can lead to discussions about hobbies, careers, activism, or lifelong dreams.
• It can create inspiration within the group, as people discover shared interests or new perspectives.
• Passionate stories often reflect deep-seated values and purpose, making conversations more meaningful.

4️⃣ What is a key decision you’ve made that has shaped your life?

🔹 Why this works:
Life is a series of choices, and reflecting on a defining decision allows guests to explore the impact of risk-taking, intuition, and opportunity. It can surface moments of courage, doubt, and learning that shaped their journey.

🔹 Possible conversation outcomes:

• Someone may share about leaving a job, moving cities, ending a relationship, or starting something new.
• It can lead to discussions about intuition vs. logic, regret vs. confidence, and how we navigate uncertainty.
• It helps people see how even the smallest decisions can have profound ripple effects in their lives.

5️⃣ What is something you wished more people asked you about yourself that they rarely do?

🔹 Why this works:
This question invites guests to share hidden parts of themselves, allowing for deeper self-expression. It can also reveal how people feel unseen or overlooked in their daily lives.

🔹 Possible conversation outcomes:

• It may lead to unexpected insights, as people reveal interests, experiences, or skills they rarely get to talk about.
• It can create greater connection and empathy, as participants get to know each other in a way they normally wouldn’t.
• It highlights how often we only scratch the surface in conversations, encouraging more thoughtful, intentional dialogue.

6️⃣ Who is one person who has shaped your life in a meaningful way?

🔹 Why this works:
This question brings up gratitude, mentorship, and impact, allowing guests to reflect on the people who have changed their lives for the better. It fosters a spirit of appreciation and storytelling.

🔹 Possible conversation outcomes:

• Guests may share about teachers, mentors, family members, or even chance encounters that left a lasting mark.
• It can lead to conversations about mentorship, support systems, and paying it forward.
• Reflecting on positive influences naturally brings warmth and depth to the discussion.

Here are some resources that have great questions I often use when hosting my own salon dinners:

•  Vulnerability is Sexy Card Game — created by my friend and lovely human Corey Blake, these are a staple for me in terms of finding all sorts of juicy questions that turn salon dinners into places of deep connection

• Where Should We Begin: A Game of Stories — created by psychotherapist Esther Perel, this game includes wonderful questions that will help inspire your group to talk about what’s important

• Find Your Moonshot Game — created by another friend, Jeremy DeRuiter, Personal Development Mentor at Biggby Coffee, the questions included in this game focus on your dreams, ambitions, purpose, and life goals, which make for extraordinary conversations that will help you build greater connection with your group. 

Salon dinners are more than just meals—they're powerful spaces for connection, storytelling, and meaningful conversation. Whether you're hosting a small gathering or a large dinner party, using this format can transform the way people engage with each other.

Ready to host your first salon dinner? Start by choosing a date, inviting a small group, and picking a powerful discussion question. Let me know how it goes!